


War Never Changes

by dontknowcats



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fallout, Angst, Drug Use, F/F, F/M, Original Character Death(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2016-01-05
Packaged: 2018-05-10 00:25:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5561725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontknowcats/pseuds/dontknowcats
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Atheva and Aerys Lavellan lead their motley crew across the Commonwealth, experiencing hardships that come with death and relapse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Currently a WIP. If you have any characters you want to see in this fic, message me on tumblr (@thirdrailsniper) or comment here.  
> Aerys and Arla belong to Nika (@niklisson on tumblr). Thank you for letting me write them in!

Her fingers ran over the bent piece of plastic, tracing the shapes she could make out through the haze of happiness that filled her head. The now-empty bottle of Day Tripper lay on the ground next to her, cap tossed a few feet away. She had the photo memorized, the only one she had taken with the other two girls.

_“Arla, Aerys! Look at this!” She had called, running her hand over the perfectly preserved camera. “Do you think there’s film in it?”_

_Aerys picked it up once she was close enough and flipped the film door open. “Yeah, looks like there is! Only a few more, though,” she warned before snapping a quick picture of Arla’s curious expression. The blonde and Atheva had giggled at the sudden redness of the third’s cheeks before she had snatched the photo away. Immediately the scraps were floating towards the floor._

_“Why’d you do that?” Atheva had whined, her smile falling into a frown. “I was going to keep that.”_

_“No more surprise photos!” The second redhead exclaimed before wrapping an arm around Atheva’s waist. “But we should get some together, right?”_

_“Absolutely!” Aerys said, nodding her head in agreement. “Atheva in the middle.” The blonde walked towards the two and stood on the other side of Atheva before holding the camera out in front of them. “On the count of three, smile. One. Two. Three!”_

_The flash caught Atheva and Arla off guard and made them stumble back in surprise. “What the hell was that?!” “Jesus fucking Christ, Aerys!”_

_The blonde laughed as the photo printed out of the camera and she pulled it out with a practiced hand. She shook the small piece of plastic until the picture was developed enough for the other girls to see it. “Ta-dah! I think we look pretty cute, right?”_

_“It looks just like you, Arla!” Atheva gasped as she took the photo into her hands._

_“Well yeah, that’s because it is me, dummy,” the other replied with a quick kiss to her cheek. “So dumb and cute. But still too smart for a raider gang.”_

_“Damn right!”_

The drugs pushed the memory closer and closer to the forefront of her mind until Atheva was stuck in it. She was smiling and laughing with Arla again, the photo crisp and clear in her hand. But then another image shot forward. Arla laying on the beach, her red hair splayed out beneath her. Her eyes shut as she tried to sunbathe. Atheva walked over to her, smiling down at the woman that had saved her from what would have ended up killing her.

“Arla?” She asked nervously, afraid of what would happen if she was awake.

No answer.

She took a deep breath, thinking over her options. Wake her up and worry about Arla leaving or leave her asleep and worry about her never knowing? She breathed out and sat down beside the sleeping girl. “Arla.” She spoke louder this time and reached out to shake her shoulder. The sand wasn’t as soft beneath her as she had expected, nor was it warm. Neither was the sunbathing beauty beside her.

“A-Arla?” She began to shake her shoulder harder and the memory began to fade into another.

The redhead’s eyes shot open and her jaw dropped. The sand melted into cold asphalt. The sound of the seagulls that had been flying around them deepened into the laugh of a victorious raider. Tears began to run down Atheva’s cheeks as the bullet wound ripped back open in Arla’s skull, the red hair beneath her head liquefying into blood.

She didn’t know what to do but scream.

Atheva had seen people die before, had mourned her fallen allies, but none of them had loved her. None of them had saved her like Arla had. And she had never been forced to relive their deaths when her drugs began to wear off.

She knew that they had to wear off eventually, but the hours she had planned on wasting couldn’t have passed already! How long had she been watching Arla in the sand? Studied the way she smiled and laughed when they found the camera? No, no, it couldn’t be happening!

Hands suddenly landed on her shoulders and she snapped her head straight up to find herself back in the real world, eye-to-eye with Aerys.

The blonde’s eyes were underlined with dark bags and tears amplified the red lines that shot through her whites. The painted lines beneath her eyes were smudged into green blobs upon her cheeks from mixing with her tears beneath rubbing hands. Atheva could only imagine how her own warpaint looked.

“Are you okay?” Aerys whispered, hands moving to caress her friend’s cheeks.

“No. No, I’m not! I’m out of Day Tripper and Arla is still dead and… and I never got to tell her I love her! Not once!” She hissed, tears burning in her eyes. “I need more… I was so close to telling her this time. How far are we from Goodneighbor?”

“Y-You already bought Fred’s entire stock, Atheva. We can’t go back today,” she whispered, hands sliding back to her shoulders. “Listen, Solas and I found some alcohol. You want some vodka or something?”

Atheva shrugged her hands off her shoulders before trying to stand up. Her balance wasn’t the best when she came off a high, but she knew she just had to keep at it before it got better. “Just give me some food. I’m headed to Goodneighbor so I can stake out Fred,” she mumbled as she finally took a step forward.

Aerys grasped at her arm, more for support than anything, and looked at her. “Take Cullen with you.”

“Fuck him! He’s going to tell me to stop and you know it!” She snapped. “I’m going to go on my own. If I die, I die.” Her heart stopped as she watched her friend begin to cry. It was silent, which was worse than hearing her sob and moan about losing another friend. Uncomfortable moments passed before she gave in. “I’ll take Cullen.”

Had she even meant it? Did she really care if she was alive? Right now everything hurt too much for her to think about it too hard. She approached the center of their camp and looked over at Solas. “Where’s my stuff?” She asked, her voice soft. How was she going to admit to making a synth’s girlfriend cry? Avoid it like all her other problems?

“Cullen put everything in that building over there. Apparently it’s up to Brotherhood codes,” he said before walking over to her. His grip was firm on her shoulder as he pushed a vodka bottle towards her. “I know that he’s going to make you stop taking your pills, so hopefully this will help.”

“He won’t.”

“Oh, he will. Have I ever been wrong about this stuff before?” He asked with a knowing smile.

Atheva looked between him and the bottle before snatching it away. “Sorry about Aerys. Maybe you’ll get to cuddle her more now or something.”

“You have nothing to apologize for. At least not to me. If not before you leave, you should apologize when you return,” he said before returning to his chair. She noticed he was reading another book the group had found while scavenging for items earlier that day.

The bottle was heavy in her hand, almost full. It was extremely rare for them to find an unopened bottle of anything but beer and Nuka Cola, leaving her unsure as to if it was right for her to take it. The door to the building was shut, and she knew why the moment she opened it.

A dirty bedsheet covered Arla’s body in the corner of the room. Cullen sat a few feet away, going through her things. His power armor was on the other side of the room behind a counter.

“What are you doing?!” Atheva snapped, rushing towards him. She was smart enough not to drop the bottle or use it to attack, and she kept it cradled in her arms as she rammed into him, knocking him over. “Why are you going through her stuff?”

Cullen looked up at her in surprise, eyes widened. “I-I was just trying to see if she had any food and ammo!” He said, raising his hands up defensively, “I swear!”

“Just like you swore yourself to the Brotherhood?” She spat before lightly kicking his shin. “Listen. I need you to stay on my good side until we get back here. Now get up.”

“Get back? Where are we going?” He asked as he pushed himself back up onto his feet. Despite standing almost a foot taller than her, there was no way he would try to fight her on most matters.

“Goodneighbor. Fred’s gonna have more DT tomorrow and I need it. And before you say I don’t, just realize you don’t understand. You know jackshit about us. You’re not even supposed to be here; just weaseled your way in with Aerys and Solas.”

Cullen opened his mouth to speak, but sighed instead. “Alright. Let’s go.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atheva and Cullen make their way to Goodneighbor to buy more Day Tripper. Atheva explains her story with Arla.

Atheva’s hold on her gun loosened as she saw the neon lights of Goodneighbor only a few blocks away. “C’mon, you sloth,” she said over her shoulder.

“Hey, I’m only slow because it’ll save our skin. I know we’re close but there are always some super mutants around here so just… stay low and slow.”

Atheva turned around, now walking backwards, to give Cullen a look that perfectly conveyed her ‘Please shove your entire head up your ass’ attitude. “Fuccckkk that,” she sang, too eager to return to the happy memories she had left hours ago. She wanted to rush ahead and leave him behind, but she wasn’t unhappy enough to leave someone to die. So instead she had him watch her back as she continued the walk backwards.

By the time they reached Goodneighbor, she had fallen over twice. Cullen had come to her rescue both times, leaving her annoyed and embarrassed. As they entered the settlement, she noticed most of the shops were closed. It made sense with the sun barely beginning to rise.

“Do you think he’ll be there?”

“Probably not. But if he knows what’s good for him he’ll be there,” she said with a frown. She lead him through the back alleys that made up the main walkways of the town and towards the hotel.

When they entered she immediately groaned at the emptiness of the lobby. “He isn’t here. C’mon, we can sit over there until he wakes the fuck up,” she muttered before walking towards an unoccupied couch to the right of the door.

She fell upon it with her back against the far arm and her legs helping her take up half of the couch. Her gaze dropped from Cullen as he exited his power armor so he could sit comfortably beside her. Minutes passed in silence until finally he spoke.

“So… how did you and Arla meet?” He asked hesitantly, knowing he was opening fresh wounds. “You don’t have to answer… I just thought it might… help. To talk about her.”

She leaned her head towards the arm of the couch so her hand could help prop it up. When Cullen finally looked away, not expecting an answer, she found herself wanting to tell him. She wanted to scream everything about Arla from the rooftops since he asked. But no one else would care. “She saved me.”

The look of surprise on his features made Atheva’s lips twitch into a brief smile.

“I was… well, I was basically stolen as a baby by some raider gang. I don’t know where I’m from or if it’s even still around, but I just know I was raised to do drugs and murder people,” she said with a bitter laugh. “But one day… God, I was just so lucky to have stolen everyone’s day tripper. I basically ran off to do it all without getting in trouble and missed out on being killed by greenskins.

“When I returned to the camp I found everyone just… well, everywhere. You know what super mutants do. Anyway, I just fucking ran. Already had everything I owned on my back so I just kept going until I ran into Arla. I still looked like a raider, so she understandably drew her weapon.

“But she let me talk. I was able to tell her everything and begged for help because I knew otherwise I would die. And she took me in.” Atheva paused and looked down at her lap. “She helped me get off the DT, helped me actually fucking fit in with non-raiders. I… She was an angel. And I loved her.”

She slid her bag off of her shoulders and rummaged around in it for her stash of caps. “One time, when we were in Diamond City, I saw a ring. Just a little gold band, but I knew I wanted to give it to her. I… I was going to go buy it next time we were in Diamond City.” She held onto the metal box so tightly that her knuckles turned white.

Cullen sighed as he watched a single tear travel the length of her nose and land on the box. “You probably don’t want to, but… If you need a shoulder,” he said, opening his arms up. He didn’t expect her to move at all, but the way she leaned against him was comforting. “So, when did you and Aerys and Solas meet?” He asked in an attempt to distract her.

“We, um, met in Diamond City. Well, Solas was outside because you know how they are about synths,” she said before sniffling. “Um, Aerys was, uh, giving Moe some old baseball stuff she found and we had been trying to do that little odd job. She ended up giving us some of the caps she got for it and then we helped her out by saving her and Solas from some, um….” She glanced at him nervously.

He sighed and nodded his head. “Some of the Brotherhood, I understand. You don’t have to worry about telling me that kind of thing, Atheva. Solas is my ally now and I would do the same.”

She smiled in relief and nodded. “Alright. Any more questions?”

The two continued to chat for hours, Atheva thankful for the distraction and Cullen thankful for the new information on the group. They watched the sky brighten through the windows together before waiting patiently for Fred to take his usual spot in the lobby. People walked in and out, but the one couple that had gotten her attention was another man in power armor and a brunette holding hands. Well, the best they could with the power armor in the way.

When Fred finally arrived she stood up as fast as any person could. She dug around in her bag for the box of caps once again and began to walk over to the drug dealer.

“What are you doing?” Cullen asked.

She turned around, obviously confused. “Going to buy my drugs?”

“No you’re not.”

She groaned. “I knew you would do this!”

“No, no, you can buy your drugs. But not with that money. You’re going to buy that ring with your caps,” he said as he walked to his power armor. He grabbed the helmet and dug around for a moment like a magician with a top hat. “Here.” He held out a small bag of caps to her. “Isn’t it only about three hundred?”

She took the bag hesitantly, unsure of what to do. “Why do I have to buy the ring?” She asked, though she didn’t let their conversation stop her from approaching Fred.

“I think it would help. Seeing it at the store would just make Diamond City hurt, right? Well… at least this way you’ll have the ring and you can remember why you loved her. Right? That sounds right…” He added under his breath.

Atheva shrugged and held the bag out to Fred. “One bottle of Day Tripper, please.”

 

* * *

 

“If you need anything I’ll be a room away,” Cullen reminded her before closing the door behind him.

‘How does the power armor not fall through the floor?’ She thought to herself as she entered her own room at the end of the hall. The two had agreed it would be best for them to rest up before returning to Aerys and Solas, especially if she wanted an instant high.

Atheva shrugged her bag off of her shoulders onto the floor beside the door, not really caring at the moment if it would be easy to steal. She rubbed her eyes with the heels of her palms, the skin covered with black war paint and the charcoal she had used to color her eyelids. She wasn’t scared of it hurting her. She was never bothered by it after Arla showed her how to apply it with her pinkie finger.

She kicked her boots off as she pulled the bottle of day tripper out of her bag. Her grip on it was tight, like an alcoholic and their drink, as she made her way to the bed. For some reason it all felt like a formality, however. A tradition that didn’t entirely matter to her.

Once comfortable on the bare mattress, she stared at the bottle. She shook it and listened to the ten pills inside bounce against the sides and each other before finally settling at the bottom. Did she really want to fight the haze to find Arla again? Or risk finding her dead in the end again?

Her nose scrunched up as she finally decided to set the bottle aside and curl up on her side, eyes locked onto the wall. She knew she would regret it, but she had to stop. Had to give up her false happiness to find the one she had so recently lost.

“Damn you, Solas,” she grumbled as she shut her eyes.

 

* * *

 

_“Arla?” She breathed, reaching out for the girl’s hand._

_Her eyes shot open, full of fear until she realized it was Atheva. “Don’t scare me like that!” She said with a laugh as she sat up. Her red hair was full of sand, but she didn’t seem to care. “Is everything alright? You look a little pale.”_

_“I-I, um… I just wanted to, um, tell you that I love you. A-And I want you to have this before you say anything!” She said, reaching her hand out with a small gold ring sitting on her open palm. “It doesn’t… have to mean anything, but if you want it to that’s… that’s good.”_

_Atheva’s cheeks burned as she waited for an answer. Would she like it? Was it okay to say it didn’t have to mean anything?_

_“I love you too,” Arla said, leaning in to kiss the other girl’s cheek as she took her hand. “And it’s going to mean everything to me. Even after everything.”_

_Tears ran down the ex-raider’s cheeks as she watched her savior slip the ring onto her finger. “Even when we s-say goodbye?”_

_“Even when we say goodbye.” Arla reached out to brush her cold fingers against her cheek._

Atheva gasped as her eyes shot open, her cheeks and the mattress wet with her tears. Her chin trembled as she pressed her fingers against the wall she faced, lips whispering a soft farewell.


End file.
